Tuesday, September 20, 2011

MITZI MAGEE IS HERE!

SHE’S HOT! SHE’S FAST! SHE’S SEXY! AND SHE’S SPAYED!
When small town reporter Ed Magee wrote his latest small town story for his small town newspaper he knew he was onto something big! Maybe the biggest story of his life! But even Ed didn’t know he’d just written a life-altering article, even Ed wasn’t prepared for the reaction from his small town boss and editor-- who read the piece, smiled up at Ed, patted him on the back, and fired him immediately! 

BUT WHEN THINGS GET TOUGH—THE TOUGH GET GOING!
And Ed went straight to the top! The top of Topeka Blvd to Elsie’s Bar, and trusted friend and ally Jack Daniels! He was dead drunk in fifteen minutes! Yet no amount of alcohol could blur the vision of loveliness sitting down on the stool beside him…the soft, raven hair, the luscious red lips, grab-me dress and hypnotic eyes… that beckoned and teased a mesmerized Ed with bold and provocative promises! How could he know this dark witch was drawing him into a forbidden world of sinister pleasure and unearthly desires, a vortex of unearthly sensations more outrageously voluptuous than his wildest dreams! How could he possibly know this shadowy seductress would vanish in a huff and stick him with the tab?

THAT’S WHEN THINGS GET REALLY HOT!
Beaten? Down trodden? Fired from his job and jilted at the bar? Maybe. But that didn’t mean Ed Magee wasn’t suicidal. He trudged back to his little two room dump to lick his wounds…never dreaming, never conceiving, that someone would be there waiting to lick them for him. Waiting to lick him all over! The raven-haired seductress from the bar? No. The pert young secretary from his ex-job? No. The middle-aged landlord with the mustache and the tattoo on her left arm? No. She would come later at the first of the month. What awaited Ed now in his humble, rent-tardy bungalow was the last person on this Earth Ed Magee expected to see: his old boss and editor from the small town paper!

BACK ON TOP!
Ed had barely gotten the top back on the can of month-old Spam when he saw the figure waiting quietly on his living room couch. What was his old newspaper boss doing here--having just fired him an hour earlier? More importantly, how had he gotten in through the locked door? More importantly than that, what was he doing wearing Ed’s own suit? Even still more importantly why were his ex-bosses’ eyes glowing red now like a bat’s and when had he acquired those shiny white fangs? And why was he leaping across the room now to bury those fangs in Ed’s throat? All the while muttering about how vampires were taking over the town…in fact, the whole world! And would Ed be interesting in joining the movement? And would there be medical benefits, Ed wonders, if you’re already dead? And would the stacked brunette at the bar be there? And whose poodle just crashed through the living room window behind Ed’s ex-boss…and why did it have fiery red eyes and glistening fangs too! And who’s going to pay for that window when the landlord shows?

THE CURSE
Ed cursed himself for not paying the cable bill and keeping up with CNN--clearly there was a lot more going on in the world than he was privy to. But in the next few seconds, Ed Magee, ex-newspaper reporter and sometimes moderate-to-heavy drinker, would discover not only just how nightmarishly unbelievable the world had become, how there was a war going on that would put every person on Earth in peril, but that to fight that war--even without a job---he’d not only have to put his very soul at peril, but somehow afford a dog license!

CAN YOUR NERVES STAND THE STRAIN?
Can any sane person remain sane under the ceaseless horror awaiting him in the nerve-shattering pages of this novel? Only to realize he’s been totally ripped off because the real answers don’t come until well into the series’ third book! Only you, and millions like you—no, billions like you--can know the answers to these questions…questions that demand yet more answers that in return require yet more questions!

Mitzi_final_cover
Mitzi_final_cover